I'm too sexy for this shirt...

It was only a matter of time, really. As a rising star in the world of high fashion, what with my quirky Banana Republic wardrobe---carefully infused with flecks from Mervyns and Kohls---I have finally been awarded fashion's highest honor. This month I appear on the pages of Vogue Magazine along with fellow fashion icons Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel (Jezebel, as I affectionately call her). I like to think of my style as Jew Chic...a sort of nouveau take on Lagerfeld and Vera Wang, but with a bit more of a retro quality around the ass and waist.